There is a common psychological phenomenon in which a person attributes others’ behavior to character or personality, but his or her own behavior to the situation and outside circumstances. It is so common, in fact, that social psychologists call it “the fundamental attribution error.”
It is so easy to excuse our own bad behavior but judge others harshly, sometimes even for the exact same behavior. I snapped at the grocery cashier because the baby kept me up all night, and I was tired. That person snapped at her because he’s a rude person.
Knowing this about human nature, God reveals to us how important it is for us to forgive for the sake of our own souls.
Growing in holiness means striving to be more like God. How can we be more like God while refusing to adopt mercy, one of His primary attributes? How can we truly appreciate God’s forgiveness and, at the same time, not give it to others?
Plus, by holding on to grudges and unforgiveness, we enter the near occasion of sin. How much easier it is to commit evil against another when we convince ourselves that they deserve it for what they did to us!
It is important to note that forgiveness means letting go of the ill will and the desire for revenge. It does not mean we must recklessly forget harm done to us. In Jesus’s parable, the merciful king does not require the man to pay the debt when asked for mercy. He also does not offer him another loan.
So as we reflect on the readings today, let us pray that God will give us the strength to let go of anger and wrath, that we might more fully live for the Lord. Then we may bask in the light of His mercy, reflecting it to others.
J.M. Pallas has had a lifelong love of Scriptures. When she is not busy with her vocation as a wife and mother to her “1 Samuel 1” son, or her vocation as a public health educator, you may find her at her parish women’s bible study, affectionately known as “The Bible Chicks.”
Merridith Frediani’s perfect day includes prayer, writing, unrushed morning coffee, reading, tending to dahlias, and playing Sheepshead with her husband and three kids. She loves finding God in the silly and ordinary. She writes for Ascension Press, Catholic Mom, and her local Catholic Herald in Milwaukee. Her first book Draw Close to Jesus: A Woman’s Guide to Eucharistic Adoration is expected to be released summer 2021. You can reach her at 
Tami Urcia grew up in Western Michigan, a middle child in a large Catholic family. She spent early young adulthood as a missionary in Mexico, studying theology and philosophy, then worked and traveled extensively before finishing her Bachelor’s Degree in Western Kentucky. She loves tackling home improvement projects, finding fun ways to keep her four boys occupied, quiet conversation with the hubby and finding unique ways to love. She works at Diocesan, is a guest blogger on